


take me out (of this world)

by Rokutagrl



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Chat Logs, M/M, March prompts, OiKage Year 2019, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pining, Prompt: Aliens, convention au, fake dating au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2019-12-31 22:46:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18323498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rokutagrl/pseuds/Rokutagrl
Summary: Oikawa Tooru just wants to eat something that isn’t Go-gurt, and maybe meet some of his online friends at the upcoming science fiction convention in town. If only life for a college student out on his own wasn’t so expensive.Or maybe if he had an underclassman who needed his help and might be willing to buy his dinner just long enough to save up for a weekend pass. Win/win, right?





	take me out (of this world)

**Author's Note:**

> Oikage Year 2019: March Prompts: Aliens & Faking Dating AU

Blue skies sit far on the horizon. The sun  is strong this evening, breaking through even the thick rain clouds set overhead the gymnasium, it's vibrant beam giving the world an eery, orange glow. It's the first sign of daylight Oikawa's glimpsed after practice since the long, dark nights of winter had seemed to never want to leave.    
  
Rain droplets slip down the length of Kageyama's bangs. He says nothing but, "Please!" again and again.   
  
"You're a persistent little prick," Oikawa sneers.    
  
He hears some of their teammates jittering about behind him, their footsteps damp and sloshing on the pavement. He hasn't bothered to learn all of their names just yet. Most of them will quit before the first semester ends. They're more preoccupied planning where to eat than to spare the two of them a glance, but Oikawa feels his cheeks heat regardless.   
  
"I need you to help me," Kageyama insists.    
  
Oikawa hears it, the distinct lack of the full request. It surprises him that Kageyama might have the ability to feel shame, even after chasing Oikawa out of the locker room and pinning him just outside the gymnasium.   
  
"Ask one of your friends."    
  
Kageyama looks upwards then. Rain slips down the chisel of his jaw, hesitates on the point of his chin before it falls indistinctly with the rest of the downpour. His lips pull back tightly, his face so pinched that Oikawa almost asks if he's constipated.   
  
"Oh my god," Oikawa exclaims under an excited breath. "You don't have any friends."    
  
"I do!" Kageyama shouts.    


It feels like the world pauses for him to consider.    
  
"I do! I have — Hinata! And..." his voice lowers, this time his gaze fluttering back to the footpath. "Others," he finishes cryptically.

Oikawa laughs glibly. “I can't believe it!” Oikawa shifts, his shoes so damp from being stationary that they squish uncomfortably. He winces, but continues, “You don't have any friends,  _ fuck!”  _

“Neither do you,” Iwaizumi says, tapping his shoulder on his way by. Kageyama stiffens up at the spine as Iwaizumi gives him a polite wave on his way past. 

“I do, too, Iwachan!” Oikawa shouts at his back. “At least I have Kuroo!” he sticks out his tongue, even if Iwaizumi can't see him. Regardless, Iwaizumi just holds up his arm in a wave of dismissal. 

“Sure do,” Kuroo slides up beside him. “Ready?” he asks, hiking his bag further up his shoulder.

“So you see,” Oikawa says, tilting his head back and to the side to stare Kageyama down from his nose, smiling as smugly as he can, “we must be on our way.” Water tickles down his neck, the drizzle never lightening around them. He pulls Kuroo along, pointedly keeping his eyes on the horizon. It's still bright and blue. “Bye, bye Tobio~!” 

But before they pass, his wrist is grasped. Tight and warm is the hand around his skin, and Oikawa looks back. 

“Please,” Kageyama pleads. His eyes are as brilliant as the far off sky and something clenches in Oikawa's chest. “Consider what I asked, Oikawa.” There's a fierceness to his voice, steadfastness in his gaze and it roots Oikawa to the pavement even as Kageyama scampers back towards the gym. At the door he seems to remember something and turns back, bowing at Oikawa and Kuroo before reentering.

“What was that about?” Kuroo asks.

He swallows. “Don't worry about it.“

The ring of Oikawa’s skin where Kageyama had held him remains warm the whole way home. 

*****

“What's for dinner tonight?” Oikawa asks his fridge, already pulling open the door to the freezer. It takes some rummaging before Oikawa gets his prize: the very last of the Strawberry Splash Go-gurt he'd hidden behind the ice maker. He makes sure to shove it immediately into the pocket of his hoodie as soon as it breaches past the door, checking to make sure his roommate hadn't materialized in the room while his attention had been elsewhere. Kuroo would be cross if he knew. 

Once he's tucked safely in his own room, door locked, Oikawa savors his meal. The bed's mattress sinks under his weight when he kneels on it, the springs long since dead.  It’s been that way since he and Kuroo fished it from the apartment complex’s trash, but if visitors assume it’s from his own exploits, well, Oikawa’s not in the business of correcting them. 

He sits up on his haunches to reach the window's latch, rolling the glass open to let some air into the room. Petrichor seeps in through the mesh screen. Oikawa stays by the window, breathes it in deeply. It’s pleasant. The cold season had left his room smelling stale, even when it felt like winter had been invited in through porous drafts. 

Oikawa leans until the wires rest against his forehead, pushing only enough to feel as if there were nothing even there, but not enough to dislodge the screen. 

Outside is still vibrant and hazy, the drizzle having followed him home, lazily pelting the sidewalk and passersby. Oikawa watches a lady across the way stop to let her dog sniff, a reddish, stout breed Oikawa doesn't know the name of. His eyes droop over the mundanity, fat droplets plopping at his sill almost enough of a lullaby that it begs him to take an early evening nap with the light chill of the sun showers outside as his blanket. He rolls the very ends of the Go-gurt tube up inch by inch, until the wad of it rolls up under his nose.

By his feet on his bed, his laptop chimes. 

Then again. 

Oikawa stares at the screensaver, leaning back on one hand, the empty Go-gurt tube clutched between his teeth. It rings again with several messages before he decides against his nap and slides off his back legs, pulling the laptop onto his thighs. Oikawa shoulders himself back into a nest of pillows at the headboard of his bed, the pull dislodging his charger from the docking port. He drops the remnants of dinner into the nearby trash can, burying it under an old magazine already tossed away.  _ Just in case. _

He closes the full screen of the movie he'd fallen asleep to last night. Behind it, the group chat explodes with new messages, zipping down the box faster than Oikawa can read.

> **defenderoftheoatmeal** : I heard they got that dude who directed the last Godzilla movie for a panel this year. 
> 
>  
> 
> **pacificrimjob** : !!!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> **pacificrimjob:** i have to buy my badge still…….
> 
>  
> 
> **SuperWhoLock420:** prices go up next week
> 
>  
> 
> **BigFootBigHeart:** Better do it soon
> 
>  
> 
> **BigFootBigHeart: ^^**
> 
>  
> 
> **defenderoftheoatmeal:** lol
> 
>  
> 
> **Spacegrl:** we should find time to meet up
> 
>  
> 
> **defenderoftheoatmeal:** Oooooh
> 
>  
> 
> **Spacegrl:** we can discuss when the schedule is finalized
> 
>  
> 
> **Spacegrl:** but maybe that saturday?

 

It takes some shuffling back through his tabs before Oikawa finds the official con’s site. He frowns. The badge prices already make him feel woozy. It's about seven boxes of lunch and dinner-- if he doesn't split the price with Kuroo.

A message pops up in the top right of the screen, another chime from his laptop speakers accompanying it. Oikawa glances at the screen name and breathes a laugh through his nose. Clicking it brings him to another chat room.

 

> **m1lkyway:** have you gotten your pass yet

 

Oikawa taps at the keys pensively. 

 

> **cryptidfckr:** no
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** im debating if the con is more important than eating
> 
>  
> 
> **m1lkyway:** oh
> 
> **m1lkyway:** idk
> 
> **M1lkyway:** sorry.
> 
>  

He huffs another laugh. His stomach gurgles, perhaps chiming in on their conversation with it's own protest, but Oikawa ignores it. 

 

> **cryptidfckr:** too bad im not a girl
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** itd be easier to find an idiot to date me
> 
> **Cryptidfckr:** just for someone like me i mean
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** and then id never worry about food again
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** lol

 

He taps back over to the main group chat. The conversation has since picked up, the rest of his online friends filtering in from work or university. Little side chats start diverting throughout the group, some talking about upcoming films they're excited about, others discussing the latest recommendation. 

Oikawa settles in deeper to his pillow bundle, grabbing deftly for the blanket around his ankles. It is still far too early when the sun dips below the horizon. The next time Oikawa looks up from his laptop, the world is dark save for the lights dotting every few windows of the building across the street. The rain has picked up, boisterous sounding now that he can no longer see it. 

His laptop dings and Oikawa looks back. 

 

> **m1lkyway:** they would be lucky to date you as you are

 

Oikawa's toes curl. 

 

> **cryptidfckr:** lmao
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** too kind
> 
>  
> 
> **m1lkyway:** im sure you get asked out all the time

 

He stiffens. The memory of Kageyama, bright blue eyes gleaming through a hazy, sun-filled smog, makes his chest feel tight. He'd been so brazen, unyielding. Not entirely an undesirable trait. Oikawa frowns. He  _ had  _ asked him out-- in some, deluded sort of way. 

Oikawa runs his tongue along the bottom of his lip. 

 

> **cryptidfckr:** not much since high school 
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** the type of girls who would date me aren’t into monster flicks and scifi
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** not too many guys want to deal with me 
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** always ends up they feel like they're competing with me
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** or against girls
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** And not actually dating me ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
>  
> 
> **m1lkyway:** ah

 

Kageyama would probably be a bad boyfriend. Worse than himself, Oikawa thinks. He tightens his fist above the keyboard. Gruff and stubborn. Single minded and  _ adorably _ simple. He'd be  _ the _ worst and so Oikawa can see, can understand why Kageyama had been so adamant. 

He relaxes his fingers, tugs back on each of them until the knuckles crack satisfyingly. His earlier fatigue has eased into a crackle of energy. It'll be a long night.

 

> **m1lkyway:** would you like to watch another movie with me tonight? 

 

Oikawa breathes in. He releases the breath through puckered lips. 

 

> **cryptidfckr:** i heard santa claus conquers the martians is awful
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** so itll be great 
> 
>  
> 
> **m1lkyway:** cant wait 
> 
>  
> 
> **m1lkyway:** * **link***
> 
>  

Oikawa resettles himself on his side while the link loads up in his browser. He makes to re-plug his charger back in before propping himself up enough to type. 

 

> **cryptidfckr:** okay
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** 3…
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** 2…
> 
> **cryptidfckr:** 1….

 

In the morning, rain has given way to a cloudless sky. Oikawa rises to his screensaver playing; old faces from high school smiling back at him.

The groupchat is still open when he clicks past last night's third movie, his last few goodbyes still at the bottom. But there's an unread message on the side in his private chat that Oikawa doesn't remember seeing before his eyes had felt too heavy to keep open. 

 

> **m1lkyway:** just read theyll be playing house (1977) at x-con
> 
> **m1lkyway:** it would be great if we could see it together
> 
>  

And so Oikawa makes a decision. 

But not about breakfast. He glowers at the last few packages of the Berry Blast Go-gurt still left in the box in their freezer. When he turns around, Kuroo grins at him, mouth pressed around a very distinctly red trimmed tube of Strawberry Splash. 

“I have my secrets, too,” he says. 

“Asshole _. _ ”

*****

He finds Kageyama by the locker room door, tying up his shoe laces. Oikawa wonders if they're too new to just slip on the way he does his own. He tries his best to tower over the other, the arch of his neck straining. Oikawa rests a volleyball on the swell of his hip, pinning it there with only the weight of his wrist, slurping up the tail end of his breakfast.    
  
"Okay," he says. Kageyama looks up at him, any sense of recognition infuriatingly missing in his stare.  "If I said you had a goldfish memory," Oikawa tuts, "it'd be an insult to the fish."    
  
Kageyama scowls up at him. The jut of his bottom lip is prominent and Oikawa swallows the word  _ Neanderthal _ back down his throat.    
  
"Your request," Oikawa pushes, rolling the ball up his waist and then letting it slip back down to pin against his hip. "I'm agreeing to it."    
  
_ There it is,  _ Oikawa thinks when the spark of excitement flashes in Kageyama’s eyes, the other jumping to his feet as if gravity didn’t apply to him.    
  
Oikawa holds a finger up before he can be interrupted. Kageyama goes adorably cross eyed to stare it down. "I have one condition~" he lilts, reaching for his cellphone trapped under his waistband. He flips the top open, then snaps it back shut, shooting Kageyama his most devilish smile.   
  
Kageyama looks up at him.    
  
"First, I need you to ask me again," Oikawa says. Kageyama looks baffled and he adds, "but you to have to do it exactly like yesterday."

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on tumblr @[god-fucking-dammit-mizutani](http://god-fucking-dammit-mizutani.tumblr.com/)


End file.
